Very often people who are new to Family Constellations do not have a clear understanding of what it means to be a Representative/Resonator and how to go about that in a helpful way.
The Representatives are the building blocks of a Constellation. As such, when someone steps into the Knowing Field as a Representative in someone’s Constellation, they themselves are participating in a very powerful and personal healing journey.
The Knowing Field works in a very precise and mysterious way. The person chosen to represent a family member or an aspect of a clients situation is a perfect match for what is needing to be expressed in that Family dynamic. The energy and personality of the representative is often an exact expression of a person’s family member. How this happens is one of the mysteries of the Constellations healing process.
While you do not need any training or experience as a Representative, there are, however, a few key concepts that can help you when you step into the Knowing Field. Here is a brief list of suggestions to keep in mind on how to Represent in a Constellations Workshop.
1. Focus on your body and pure emotional state without a narrative.
Do not worry if you are doing it right or wrong. If you feel insecure, that is what the Field wants to express through your representative. If you feel nothing, you are representing an ancestor who is shut down. Try to shift your focus away from if you are doing it right and place your attention on the other representatives or the environment you are in. Note what draws your attention. Note if you feel like moving, lying down, talking, etc. Whatever happens when you are in the Representative space is the information we will follow. If no information arrives, we will wait and inquire.
2. Let your body move and communicate
Information is not received only in words. Your body language and facial expression is equally valuable to verbal descriptions. Let your body language respond to another representatives body language. Do not feel a need to have the whole interaction be verbal.
3. Be a neutral messenger
Understand that what you will feel as a Representative are not a commentary on you personally. You are a messenger. Present all information with a scientific distance. There is no need to be embarrassed about what comes up. It is not personal to you and the facilitator holds no judgements.
4. Do not interpret
Make note of if you are adding your own personal interpretation of what you are sensing. Comments like, “This guy is a really mean person” is a commentary. “This guy feels a need to hit things” is a more neutral description. Try not to jump to conclusions about what you see or experience. Try not to analyze the ancestor. Rather let their nature and situation be expressed as faithfully as possible.
5. Do not suffer
If standing in a representation becomes physically difficult for you, simply dial down the intensity of the message being received. If, for example, you feel compelled to shiver with cold, after a few seconds of this, you can express this to the facilitator and then address the ancestor you are representing by saying, “Thank you, I have received the information and it has been conveyed.”
6. Do not fix anything
Honest information is the only pathway toward lasting resolution. While it may be painful to experience a rift between relatives, do not attempt to resolve conflicts between you and other representatives unless you feel that is a genuine feeling coming from the ancestor you are representing. It is not our job to fix anything in a family system. It is our job to bear witness to what arises and be a neutral messenger of precise information.