Life on this planet just keeps striving upwards despite the constant process of being cut back, torn down, or restricted. Forward movement, no matter how small, is our natural state of being. Our being is movement. We can not help but strive, even in the most adverse of times. This is because we are beings of expansion. We expand into areas of experience and revelation never before discovered. We are what is expanding our expanding universe. It is our nature to strive and learn. We can not change our inherent strength of spirit. We can not, no matter how we may try, make ourselves weak. Our natural, eternal state of being is one of strength.
This capacity in us to endure and recover from whatever blows life brings us can often cause a secondary frustration beyond the traumatic event. Sometimes we want to say, “This thing that has happened, that’s it. I quit. I can’t take any more. I’m out.” But alas, if it did not kill us, we have endured and we will arise once again, even if we don’t want to.
We do not have a choice in the matter. We are inherently and eternally strong. This is a fact. So what do we do with ourselves when we have decided to dig our heels in and not recover from some fleeting life circumstance? What logic is behind the impulse to build up a narrative of defeat?
When we lose a job or we lose a loved one, or an unexpected difficulty knocks us off our feet, our capacity to recover is directly related to how in touch we are (and at peace with) the truth of our inherent eternal strength. The fact is, we are unassailable. Resilience is our biology. The art of getting back up from blows is what we were built for because it has astronomical value beyond our comprehension. The next time you try to decide to have some situation or person be the reason you throw in the towel, take a moment to consider how much strength it will actually take for you to maintain the narrative that you have been defeated. Notice how we often apply our inherent strength to an effort of staying down. We say to ourselves and our loved ones, “No, I won’t get up this time. I’ve had it.” We then proceed to exert tremendous strength in being stubborn to prove we’ve been defeated. No one can help us when we’ve dug in our heels in this way. Why? Because we are inherently very strong! When we use that strength to prove we are not strong, the joke is on us.
It takes the same amount of energy to hold ourselves down as it does to overcome the disappointment, fear, or anger that laid us flat. We have no choice but to be what we are, which is strength itself. The only question we need to ask ourselves is how will we use that strength. To spiral up or spiral down? Both directions are infinite. We choose the quality of our experience by taking responsibility for the quality of our thought processes.
When something confusing and painful happens, we are instantly pulled to make or find meaning to explain the pain. It is literally unbearable to live in chaos so we won’t do it. But the logic that arises in us to explain the inexplicable is not always accurate. Meaning-making does not equal clarity. It just brings comfort. And that misguided logic needs to be reevaluated for errors in the mathematics otherwise the whole miserable event will happen again in some new variation. Our errors in perceptions lead to yet another blow and another disappointment or shocking surprise. The cycle continues until we take up a daily practice of examining our defeated mindset and become passionate about cultivating a growth-focused mindset.
Both mindsets take the same amount of energy to maintain. One uses our inner strength to be stubborn, bitter, and resentful. The other uses our strength to recover quickly and return to a peaceful state of innocence so that enjoyment can be how we spend most of our time. The healing arts are the field of study that seeks to identify limiting beliefs and replace them with beliefs of expansion and enjoyment. How will we apply our God-given strength in life? Will we pursue happiness or misery? Will we use our power to convince ourselves that misery is a comfort and that circumstances in the past have diminished us permanently? Will we believe there is no way through the present obstacle? Will we give that one individual the power of our infinite resilience and decide, I simply can not recover from what you have done? Or will we look pain in the eyes and use our strength to say, “I can see peace instead of this.”
How to release guilt, shame, bitterness, and sorrow is not a process that can ever be standardized. It is an experiential movement through your unique thought pathway to find a way out of a tunnel that is unique to you. How you will lift yourself out of the canyon you’ve found yourself in will be your own joyous discovery process. There are more techniques available today to heal, release, recover, and thrive than have ever existed on this planet. Exploring them all is the adventure of discovering who we are. I have personally found Systemic Constellations work to be the most robust, creative, and compassionate tool for navigating the stress of life. If you’d like to take a few steps forward in your self improvement skills, join us at our next workshop.
Until then, I wish you joy on your life’s journey.